here' what i do in class:

Through the storm of feelings, I can see I am fighting a lost cause. But is there anything better to fight for? True love. Hope. Happiness. These are the causes I champion. And I know I am doomed to fail. No matter how hard I try, I cannot make someone love me. There is no winning this battle, and it seems these are the only battles I choose to fight.

I am no more than a passing fancy, who's time is over. My very nature prohibits anyone keeping interest in me for extended periods of time. I am cursed to be the book you pull off the shelf, flip thru, and return to its place. The best I can possibly get is, "Hmmm. That kinda looks interesting." Only to be forgotten once another book is seen.

There have been multiple outcries from friends, telling me to change as necessary to succeed. And on multiple occasions I've tried, but it doesn't seem to be in the cards.
editor's note: just after this was posted, several people told me to do just this...

I will now tell you how my life will proceeed. My friends will one by one pair off and disappear into the nether-regions of marriage. I will choose to work in the civil engineering field and be miserable. I will never be in a real band. I will never live my dreams. I will live alone, with only stray emails to comfort me. I will tell everyone I am fine, and maybe even content. I will find a bar with a nice selection of live music, and try to drown my worries with alcohol while thinking "what if?"

It is probably for the best i lose this fight, and all others like it. People seem to become depressed and lose all motivation when in close contact with me. My sullen demeanor is highly contageous, and so a quarentine is required. Ha. Here's a good analogy: I'm like the King of Rohan, trapped in his keep. Putting on his armor for a futile cause. Going to ride out one last time. Only I don't have a Gandalf to save me. This story will not have a happy ending.

And the worst part is, I don't really want it to.

i apologize for the pathetic-ness of it all.