i get in moods that i can't shake...the walk in the rain only helped me a bit...i have to learn to let go of the hate...my roomate has taken over my possessions...so i took his quarters...but he owed me anyway...everyone owes me...that's probably not the case, but that's how i feel...i've stumbled onto some odd times...i play a character here...i'm not myself...not at all...my character is a friendly slacker who happened upon a girlfriend...now let's pick that apart to see how unlike me it is...well, to start with, i'm not friendly. if it was up to me, i'd not talk to these fools, but they are here all the time...so when i talk to myself, they think it's them i'm directing my speech at...and as we move on to the slacker part of my character, we see that even though this may appear to be what i am, it isn't. a slacker is supposed to do nothing and be ok with it. i do nothing, but crave motivation and want to do something...now this may be a confusion on my part, but i don't think that's the same thing. the third part of my character is that of a "boyfriend". i'm supposed to be in a "relationship" with a very nice, although somewhat strange, redheaded 20-year-old. the thing is, we don't really do anything together that would constitute this relationship...except sleep together...which of course i find to be a very uncomfortable experience...so i just stay up...which i don't think is very healthy for my fragile body. plus i don't really know her...nor does she know me...it's quite an odd adventure indeed.