mr crazy is right...we are annoying...at least i am...it seems our dynamic is a bit off...no one just wants to hang out anymore...we always have to be doing something...always have to have a plan...i blame myself and my own selfish goals for most of it...but i always have the feeling that time is running out...maybe it's because i won't have a 'summer' next year...i think that's only a small part of it...i always want something important to happen...some life-changing event that will give me purpose...not seeing the forest because of the trees...or something like that...

the past couple of days it seems i was in the right place at the right time...but i can't help feel i'm just being set up to be knocked down...like a domino...or something like that...

i try to try too hard.