ok...well...that does it...call me what you will (you/I do anyway)...but this just isn't right...you just don't do that...i don't care...it's just not right...i don't know...i call it honor...but i'm sure that's not it...it's just not right...you don't do that...as peter pan alluded to, you don't give out kisses like thimbles...

"Has he lost his mind?

Can he see or is he blind?"

now on to my 'real' life...i didn't do my homework...after a week of doing it, my 'fuck it' attitude came back with a vengence...so now i drink and i smoke, but i know it won't bring him back again...once again i point to myself and laugh at his stupidditty...i wonder as i wander...how much more i can take...its not like i am iron man...i can't take this abuse....my body has turned against me...its just my ferocious willpower that keeps me getting out of bed every mourning...only a small fraction of my being is still in this world...all my mind is bent on the other place...the place in my mind where things go how i want them to...i do really think i might be losing my sanity...slowly but surly (who's shirly?)...

time for real class.