smoke rolls out my eyes
blue chairs, green stares
airplanes fly through the sky
nobody loves you & life ain't fair
people are people, no matter what
wings of a dove, lips of a slut.

let me out
let me drown
don't let me down
airplanes sound like thunder
sweat sits on my forehead
sweat slips down my nose

my smile curls like smoke slowly spiriling
up and up and up
like a gasoline fireplace, it leaves something to be desired
my yawn builds slow: lincoln logs and child.
my stomach never settles, much like its owner.
i rest my eyes while workers work the steel overhead.
this sleep is powerful.
the dreams mean i'm weak.
weak of flesh.
weak of will.
she shouldn't be here. she means nothing.
i tell myself.
probably for the best, brother?
how will we know?
i've already thought about offering a fight.
just for show. just for fun. but that would change things.
wolves are pack animals. the lone wolf starves to death.
they never tell you that in the stories.
i can talk them into anything, but can i talk myself out?
and i just want to say, we're okay.
even though it's been awhile since we had someplace to call home.
(my writing is terrible. i know.)
i have big plans, just like always. we all do. i think i'm mostly to blame for that. when i was young i thought we could pull it off.
without a hitch.
and here come my workers...

they say Jesus is coming
well, let Him come
i have words for the Father
as well as the Son

you have used me
like Judas of old
a pawn in the game
a step-stool for souls
and no explanation
no grand designs
i'd have settled for wings
i'll have what is mine

so bring Your angels
and i'll bring my gun
i'll send you to Hell
for what you have done